One.
Year.
Later.
Part of me still doesn't believe that Brittnii is gone, and least of all, I feel like its impossible that an entire year went by without her. I woke up at six something this morning, around the time of her passing last year, and I cried. She may have been here, I don't know. Under normal circumstances, I don't wake up at 6am.
We fought like aggravated pitbulls on a bad day, but on a good day, that was my roadie. No matter how much she pinched my nerve, I never left her without. I knew that she relied on me to deliver, and I always did.
Its funny now because, before, she used to try and make us proud. Make us feel good about her and her accomplishments. I now wonder if she looks on me and feel that I did her proud. One thing about Brittnii...she did her. Lived her life to the fullest. I know that I haven't, but I know that I should.
I realized this morning, that I can talk to her. And although she can't talk back, I can talk to her. Sometimes I don't have alot to say, but I know she is listening.
I promise I will do better.
We fought like aggravated pitbulls on a bad day, but on a good day, that was my roadie. No matter how much she pinched my nerve, I never left her without. I knew that she relied on me to deliver, and I always did.
Its funny now because, before, she used to try and make us proud. Make us feel good about her and her accomplishments. I now wonder if she looks on me and feel that I did her proud. One thing about Brittnii...she did her. Lived her life to the fullest. I know that I haven't, but I know that I should.
I realized this morning, that I can talk to her. And although she can't talk back, I can talk to her. Sometimes I don't have alot to say, but I know she is listening.
I promise I will do better.
No comments:
Post a Comment