This Old House: Frank Lloyd Wright

File this under "Damn, I Didn't Know" - there are Frank Lloyd Wright houses in my backyard. Oak Park, to be exact. Anyone with an eye for design will appreciate this. Went on a mini excursion with my boss today, and she introduced me to this hidden treasure. Believe it or not, these houses (shown here) were built in the 40s. Call me late, but better late than never. I will be taking a tour this summer.
























From top: Weltzheimer - Johnson Living Room, Weltzheimer - Johnson Bedroom, Pope-Leighey Kitchen

Avri Bijon

My homeboy Av has one of the best blogs out the Chi. Av and I go back like lumberjacks, and probably unbeknownst to him, I frequent his blog regularly. Av's RockBox contains the most up-to-date material on all things upbeat or off-beat. On top of all that, Av is also very talented musical genius, graphic artist, and videographer. Av is sound, light, and color all rolled into one. Peep his craft here.

The Boardroom

I've been to alot of shows, particularly in Chicago, but I have to say some of the most entertaining are those containing The Boardroom. Mike 100s, Jeff Jones, and Vic Lloyd can't go wrong with Tony Baines on the track, or anything else they do. These guys rap. Like, real rap. With real words, and real metaphorical phrases. None of that "one, two, buckle my shoe..."

Plus, they're pretty funny.

Ivy League

So, I love Ivy League. Not because we went to school together, or because I know one of them from our days at United Center (lol), but because they are actually a really dope group. I've been with these guys for awhile, and each track gets better and harder. Ivy League = real lyricism. The League consists of Novakane (the NoGoRilla) and Agacee, with Jay Illa on the turntables. Yes, they have a REAL DJ. And of course, they hail from the City of Wind. They've been most recently featured on MTV On The Rise New Year's Eve bash which aired on MTV2. I can't say enough about these dudes that hasn't already been said, or shown for that matter. If given the opportunity, I'd jump on stage and rock a mic with these guys.

Boyfriend's Girlfriend

I guess I'm still lightweight bitter about things from the past.

I have always had this underlying feeling that, even though I'm first rate, I'm still somehow second class. Like even though I'm a good person, my blessings in love are (very) few and thousands of miles in between. And I often feel like what is mine is often placed in the laps of others...and then I have to sit around and watch them reveling in what should eventually be surrendered to me.

There are many tales I could scribe about this concept (that I have been dealing with since kingdom come), but the most recent one is this:

Four years ago, I used to be in a relationship with this guy. It was an LD thing (as usual), so, things between us progressed slowly until eventually we became a couple. We would travel across states for visits, and talk long hours on the telephone, and all that cakey stuff that I love. But to no avail, crash and burn. Long story short, he was still holding a candle for his ex-girl, and behind my back, they were having their own little version of a LD tryst. Its the same classic story. She was his first love, his first lover. Prom date. There for him during the darkest hour. All that. I don't hate him or nothing. We actually have a very good and solid friendship out of the whole thing, which is kickass magnificent, considering.

Because of this friendship, we still talk. He called me the other day, and of course were shittalking and whatnot, and basically it comes out that he has a new relationship that is going very well. He was gushing and the whole nine yards...I could tell he was proud of this relationship. So at the time, I was very supportive and I was extremely happy for him. He is a good guy and he deserves a good woman. Maybe not me, but a good woman nonetheless.

After a couple days, something just hit me. Something just penetrated so deeply and stung so badly. Is this the way the universe works? He cheated on me (boldly), yet he is the one who inherits a wonderful relationship with all the frills while I'm still single and getting nothing. I have never cheated on anyone (in my adult life), and I have always been honest about who I am when dealing with men. I guess what I'm saying is that, I'm the package...straight with no chaser. No bullshit. No falsehoods or nothing.

I don't want him back or anything (HELL NO), but I couldn't help to feel like I was, once again, second class. And yeah, of course I know that I'm not - but the feeling is still there. And I can't shake that feeling. And those who know me know that I won't settle for second. So, I'm out here trying to be still enough to know when I will be first.

Feverish Passion, Uncontained

For this year, I decided to live life more passionately. I plan to pursue life with such vigor, in a way, that will be unrecognizable to me...like I never have before.

I want to live more. Give more. Love more. Feel better. Refine who I am. Be more productive. Stop placing energy into dead sources. Stop sitting on goals. Start putting action into thoughts and ideas. I want to own me and own my direction. This is not a resolution; this is a promise. Yesterday, I took a long, hard look and said 'f*ck it'. I'm doing what I wanna do, f*ck everything else.

Everything is not all pretty and perfect and shit. Nothing is pre-packaged and post-marked. Life does not work that way. We don't know what we're gonna get. Take situations for what they are. Situational. Circumstantial. Non-permanent.

I may not get love the way I want, but I know, its coming. I can feel it. I may not have my dream job, but its coming. I have to persevere.I may not have that whole feeling, that whole-life. But its coming. I just have to know, and trust.

The seven has been put to rest.

Twothousandeight, yall. Halla.

Part Deux

Someone to read the Sunday paper with…

That's really all I ever wanted. Somebody to be nerdy with. A place where me and all my lame splendor have a home. I have never been extravagant, or demanding, or high-maintenance, but for whatever reasons, I find it very difficult to get the things I want from a relationship, or 'relationdip'. Well, let me rephrase that…

I was dealing with this guy, who, on so many levels, was perfect for me. I was thinking that, really, this dude…it don't get no better than this. I mean, from religion to sex to children to whatever, we were on the same page. It was a miraculous feeling…

But then, something happened…I don't know what, but something happened and we
just
kinda
fell
off.
Hard.

But yall know how it goes. When one door closes, another one opens…so I could kinda call my present situation 'part deux' of the aforementioned. As much as I tried to fight it, and put platonic wings on it, that connection never ceased to exist. In retrospect, it was bound to happen cause he was just too good. But I swear to you that I never saw it coming. Ever. That Jones came down on me like blustering snow in Chicago. Now this one…woooo….suki suki, now…I don't know, yall. I mean, I aint never been this connected to any man. Ever. Better than I could've ever imagined, and more than I could ever milk. Mounds of pure honey across my butter and toast. Answer to my obvious and oblivious desires. Toe-curling, mind-bending, orgasmic
conversation.
Easy, honest, and pure interaction that never skips a beat. Luscious Louis Vuitton skimmers, and a sweet Balenciaga bag. I said good, yall. So good that, I don't want to wait a minute longer than necessary…

…but see, 'part deux' has a little situation that he needs to tend to before mama can even fathom claiming her golden ticket. That's necessary.

And, really, that's what iggs me, yall. Every time I think I'm getting it…I aint getting shit.